Thursday Talk-Thread 6
Let's talk about regrets
Today, as I was waiting in the hospital, I indulged in a mental trip into my past.
A mix of emotions washed over me → amazement at how far I had come, the nostalgic joy of my firsts (first love, first kiss, first time in a gym, and so on), the wincing pain of the stuff I’d gone through, and the guilt of some of my deepest regrets.
Incidentally, one of my biggest life regrets also turned out to be one of the hugest catalysts for the initial stages of my personal growth.
It’s my first relationship → being incredibly clingy and submissive, the girl had let me manipulate and “use” her. By the end, she was in mental tatters. And I later learned, she had tried to take her own life by slashing her wrists.
2 years later, I got a taste of her pain → a painful heartbreak followed by a month or two of mild depression. Reaching out to my first ex-girlfriend, I profusely apologized → Again and again I did this but the regret refused to leave completely.
Even now, there’s a remnant of it at the back of my head. But turns out, my mistake proved a harsh teacher for the girl as well → she’s now become independent, life-focused, and is in a loving relationship with someone that helped heal her scars.
That doesn’t justify my mistake but I’m glad it turned out well for both of us.
What is your biggest regret? And how have you changed because of it?